How becoming a Carer can changed your life ... over night!

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be a Carer? I hadn't really given it much thought, except when it was Carer's week. One Friday a few months ago, my husband and l went down to see my parents on the South Coast. My mum, who is 88 is an invalid and my dad, who is 87, is her carer! he would never let any of us help him! Suddenly my dad seemed very frail and ill. To cut a long story short .... after seeing the doctor several times, l managed to get him to hospital and there, unfortunately five days later, he died, without opening his eyes or saying another word. Quite distressing for all involve. But l did decided to go and sit with my dad, just after he died. When l was young, my dad and l used to sneak away and eat a bar of plain chocolate, so this is what l did while l sat with him. I put a piece of plain chocolate on his pillow and sat and talk and eat with him, for roughly 45 mins. I never thought l would be able to sit with a dead person but I didn't find it any problem at all.  I could have sat with him a lot longer but was very aware of the need for Dad's bed! I hope the picture of my dad doesn't upset you too much.  

                                          

I did some drawings of my dad on the days before he died. My sister thought my drawings were macabre and was quite up set by them. I found that drawing my dad calmed me down. Not quite sure how the subject came up but my mum thought the drawings and the  photo were fantastic. Must admit did not expect her to be quite so interested and excited by them. Here is one of them.

                                                

After my dad died, l opened a window to let his soul out. As l did so, these two, large seagulls came and looked in the window, they then proceeded to peck on the window  then flew off. My dad was in the RAF and it seemed like they were saying ... " Right Spike ( my dad's nickname), lets fly". I must admit it did make me smile! 🤗🤗

                                                

My mum seemed a virtual invalid, my dad was her official carer!  He did everything for her and l mean everything. So the thought of her being on her own, after 65 years of marriage is terrifying for her. It would be bad enough for an able bodied person ! 

I don't love or like my mum but l couldn't see her suffering. So my husband and l stayed here and did all we could do to help. We are still here almost 3 months later! I seem to be the only one of my family that seems to want to help or is willing too. Families! 

I got Social Services involved and believe me that was hard. My mum has now been in hospital for the last 3 weeks and so l now have the hospital Social Services involved. Life is just not easy. The Hospital cannot let my mum out, unless she can look after herself! She seemed ok and now her Gout is playing up again and she cannot walk. So back to square one again. 

I was and still am finding it hard to cope and so l am seeking help from a Counsellor. But what happens when other Carers don't have an amazing husband like l have ... or ... amazing children. My own family back me and give me so much love. There are so many elderly people now, how are we going to cope?

When l first came down here to try and sort my parents out ... it was hard. I was not sure how to cope with my hate for my mother and fighting for all her requirements. I needed to find a way to manage. I made a comment to my mum about white feathers and Guardian Angels. She looked at me and said "Oh Goody Two Shoes. l suppose you are always finding white feathers"! I said"Yes" and she told me she never found them. I began to find them every day and it become a sort of standing joke with my husband. What could l do with them ... um?  I started to think of Art projects and l am still thinking. So each day l started to collect the feathers l found, stones with holes in them and lastly heart shaped stones, l found on the beach. I also have been taking images each day of things that started to catch my attention, on my daily walks.  I have not been able to put my images up each day because l just have not been in my correct mind. Now l am feeling better and more in control. So l have decided to put these images up anyway, even though they will be out of date and some times sequence. My first image is a white feather found of my first daily walks.

Next, one of the many "Beach" themed gardens on my daily walk!

And lastly I found this on the beach. Part of a bird, l think but what kind ... l have no idea. Interesting though.

I have many more images from day one but the internet here is crap, to say the least. So theseare all you get for today! Sorry. Also l can't get the paragraphs right but am too tired to correct it this evening. 
NIGHT ALL.

The adventure begins.

This is my three year old grandson, who seems to have taken over my sketchbooks. He saw me colouring and asked if if he could help me. Well what could l say?? First of all, in my black and white sketchbook and then in my small handbag sketchbook!!!! 

I had down these flowers but he coloured the one on the left in. Not bad for a 3 year old, in my view.

In this image, he had drawn round his own hand ... this is amazing for a three year old l think.

This was me having fun and doodling!

Then he wanted to paint with me, in my Art Studio. We had great fun together.

It was really lovely to watch him paint. He decided to paint my husband and got busy on it. He only painted Tony's head and when l asked why, he replied ; " Because there was no more room on the paper for his body and legs!"  Logical! So l give him another piece of paper but this time portrait instead of landscape. He started again. Then we talked about the right colour for my husband's trousers .... so then he experimented with mixing colours. My husband's trousers were actually deep red but my grandson painted them brown and told me : "They are not the right shade Nanna but it is nearly the same colour" ... cute.

I have spent a lot of my time recently drawing. Why ... because l didn't really have much space to paint or so l thought.

Then l realised that if l re-arranged my studio ... l could put one of my easels up and paint again. Simple. I just needed to be still for a minute and accept letting go of "stuff". Once l accepted that fact ... life became a lot simpler. Never thought l would ever be able to let go of my "stuff"  but if l can ...  ANYONE can!

Just a reminder of my last two painting ... learning to paint and approach my painting ... differently.

This my next painting in progress ... Watch this space. I am also learning to paint over and rub back parts of my painting. l finding it very liberty rather than scary, like l used to feel.

The next few images are giving me some wonder ideas for work. There is something so simple but beautiful about this illustration, l think.

A gorgeous white fungus. Stunning.

Can you guess what this is?  It is the kernel of a Mango stone. Beautiful in my view.

Isn't this orange colour beautiful?

Till next .... enjoy your life and keep on painting. xx

One of my students work and some of the "stuff" that inspires me .

On Thursday after school, l have a new student. She is very sweet and used to be one of my students, from artyfizz. She is working towards making a book from start to finish.  Her subjects will be futurist "strange and mystical" creatures! But before he start smaking the book, she is going to be trying out new techniques and implements. 

Today we talked about using sharp pencils, wax crayons and oil pastels. What happens for example, when you use a wax or oil pastel and then cover it with water colour paint ? 

Then l got her to copy the small creature, she had drawn earlier but to cover the  bigger piece of paper.

Children l have worked with, often find it hard to fill the whole page. I think she managed very well.

Paint and oil pastels.

Adding water colour.

Finished piece. A practice piece before she starts her book for real.

Now for some images, l have taken to help inspire me. This is an image of leaves, hanging from my bedroom window. They have been caught in a spider's web but looked as if they are just hanging there ...  in mid air!

It has been very frosty over the last few weeks. Very cold but beautiful at the same time.

Frozen puddles!

Fallen log ... beautiful colours.

Greeted by this beautiful sight this morning.

Leave a message ... good or bad ... all comments welcome.

A tidy studio ... don"t faint children ... and my new Art work!

Well ... it is quite a while since l wrote on here .... sorry. I have decided to try and use this blog to record my Art work. I have started recently, to think about the way l paint. I have spent time reading about how other artists start their paintings. Looking at loads of paintings, prints and drawings. I LOVE colour and that is another angle l am looking at.

Lets just take a few steps back ... my studio! Since l had to close my Children's Art Studio ( artyfizz), l  cleared it of 30 years worth of art equipment, some went home and rest to The Work and Play Resource Centre. After a lot of soul searching, tears and anger, my studio is now at home and a lot smaller and a hell of a lot tidier! Ha!

So now l have a smaller studio but oh so much tidier. I never thought l would say this ... " Less is more"! My husband still hasn't got over the shock of hearing me say that! :) Here is my first finish new painting, titled " My artist's brain"! 

This is my next finished piece titled " Transition".

And this is a piece in progress.

I have also been moving my lounge a round a bit too. I have had to get rid of loads and loads of my books and have managed to get them down to these two cabinets worth. Phew. very sad but had to be done. So now l have a very nice reading/meditation corner. Do love my lights. :)

Just had my hair cut ... very pleased with it. I don't normally like pictures of me but l rather like this "Selfie"! Not bad for 64! :)

Happiness, garage space and frost and ice !

When l was on the train the other day, l was in a bad mood. These two ladies got on and my mood instantly changed. Beautiful eyes and so much colour ... who could help but smile.

As many of you know we are down scaling the "stuff" in our flat. Hard emotionally but has to be done. 

A trip to the local tip!

And look .... the Christmas Fairy came and organised our garage for us!! :) Bliss!

The last few days we have had loads of fog and mist and tons of frost. Lots of photograph opportunities. Trying to catch the sparkle and also add images for my " Circles" project. So while l was waiting for my bus .... l took these images.

Ice forming on a car windscreen.

A blue plastic bag pulled on to a post.

Ice on the back window of a car .... so many lines l could"t work out what had made them. Interesting !

I can see loads of art projects forming from these images. :)